Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) - UpdatedPornsites.com
Got questions? Good, cause we've got answers!
Who are you people?
We are porn surfers just like you, and like you we don't like paying full price for porn. To rectify this situation we offer the biggest porn companies, and many smaller ones, handjobs in exchange for lowering their prices. Apparently we are getting good at it because we can often get the price down as much as 70% - 100%!
Why would anybody discount their price 70% - 100%?
That is a good question and it has many different answers depending on a porn company's individual situation. Some companies buy their bandwidth months in advance trying to take advantage of price drops. When they end up with too much bandwidth they offer memberships at discounted rates to get "something" for the extra bandwidth that would otherwise go unused. Large to mid-size companies often discount their yearly memberships to try and keep you a member for a bit longer. Small companies are often just trying to get you to see the value of their niched content and letting you inside the members area is a great way to do that.
What is up with the lifetime memberships?
Porn companies are very interested in keeping you as a member for more than one month. They are also keenly interested in a good handjob from us. So we marry the two principals into one grand idea by giving you a substantial discount for the entire lifetime of your membership, plus we work them into a frothy mess. It truly is a win-win for all parties involved, except for our wrists!
Are downloads included in my deal?
This varies from one deal to the next and it can also be different if a site is on flash sale or not. We have made a special page with many top brands that do offer downloads on the monthly membership. Why do you say in your review that downloads are included when they are not? This is because downloads are available, but not necessarily on the cheapest price points. Yearly deals will often have downloads included and they also provide you with the biggest savings, which is a nice bonus on top. Our best advice: check on the join page of the site you are about to join and look for details about download / streaming options for the membership option you want.
Do I have to copy and paste promo codes or clip coupons?
Oh hell no! All you have to do is find a deal you are interested in and click the Buy Now or Join Here buttons. No copying, pasting or clipping involved!
The discount I want says it expired! What can I do?
Our partners will not allow us to discount their products without time limits of some sort. Each time the clock expires our server checks to make sure the pornsite in question is still offering a discount before resetting the clock. This usually takes less than a minute. Try reloading the page and seeing if the clock is back running again!
What if a discount isn't working for me?
It is very rare for a discount to die without our knowledge. Usually there is a problem with cookies or with your browser's cache. If you are not seeing the discounted price on the join page try clearing your browser's cookies for the site in question. There are many plugins/extensions for doing so. We recommend this one. Sometimes clearing your cookies isn't enough. You might have a cached page that shows the wrong price. In that case we recommend you check this site for more info on refreshing your browser's cache. If that still doesn't resolve your issues you can contact us here and we'll try our best to help you sort it out.
Are you guys going to spam me or share my information?
We do not spam, however, we may occasionally send you sweet nothings in your in-box promoting our best deals, newest deals or other money saving promotions. No personal information of yours is shared with third parties. If you are getting spammed, it wasn't us!
What if I had a bad experience with a deal?
It is best to contact the company you bought the deal from, however, in some cases we can help you out, particularly when we fucked up - like a wrong price on our site. You can usually find the contact information for the different companies we work with at the bottom of their join pages. Be sure to notice that the contact info for the billing company is not always the same as the contact info for the website you joined. Billers often don't know dick about discounts or anything else. So always try to contact the website's webmaster first.
Are there limits on how many discounts I can use?
We don't put limits on our love for discounts, however, porn companies do. You can use each individual discount only once. So if you are just trying a site out that you have never tried before go for the cheapest discount we have, which is usually per month. Then if you like the site, go for the lifetime deal and really get your stroke on!
Will I always be billed in USD?
Some sites convert to local currency such as EUR for those in Europe. It will vary from one deal to the next. We list our prices as they are for USA in USD
There can be a slight difference if a conversion takes place but it will always be clearly stated on the join page where you signup what currency the payment is done in.
Got any tips for me?
Fuck yeah! Buy stock in Google!
But more to the point, there are a few caveats you should consider when buying porn at a discounted rate!
- Always check for pre-checked cross-sales on the join form all the way through the process. These usually try to automatically sign you up to alternate sites you might not wish to join. Be sure to scroll up and down, and side to side to do the hokey-pokey dance and to make sure they didn't hide anything in the margins. When canceling be sure to do this all over again on the cancellation page as well. Yeah, those hokey-pokey bastards will try anything!
- The bigger the discount the more you need to adhere to the rule above.
- Pay a little extra for a lifetime discount if you think there is even the remotest possibility that you will stick around for another month... or six... or seven. You can always cancel at any time!
Can you guys give me a handjob as well?
In a literal sense, no... but don't fret! In theory we are going to be helping you to receive handjobs for many years to come. Unless, of course, you are buying these memberships to porn sites just so you can read the articles.
How can I give back?
If you love our work as much as we enjoy providing you with round-a-bout handjobs please share us on Facebook, Twitter or where ever else you feel like sharing! You can even share us at the water cooler at work!